I like people how I like my wine
That's a fucking lie, because I hate alcohol. I can think of some people who'd say the opposite instead, you come to mind.
I wasn't going to write a letter tonight because I was busy organizing manuscripts for my projects past midnight. While I was working, my thoughts kept rolling around in my head practically begging to be written down. I guess this means I'm successfully keeping a journal now?
There's a stupid minigame in an even stupider MMORPG I used to play. It was called Wine Making and I discovered this aspect of Mabinogi through trading, which was the most fun concept I've seen in a game to be honest. Wish there were more polished games about being a merchant.
Anyways back to the fucking wine, my take is going to focus on friendships specifically because I came up with a metaphor that uses this game as an analogy.
The concept of creating good wine in this game is by ageing the wine for a long time, but also changing the barrel out consistently once a day to curb acidity.
So how does this shit relate to friendships?
Let's suppose you just let the wine sit in the same barrel without changing it out as often as you should, say once a week at most, once a month or two at longest, have this go on for several years.
This essentially is my relationship with one of my oldest friends, changing the barrel in this case is how often he checks up on me, talks to me, does something nice for me, etc.
You end up with an old, bitter wine. Or a long term friendship you have mixed feelings about.
I've told him that I dislike the time and distance between all our interactions before, multiple times actually.
I consider him my best friend, a brother, the Lupin to my Jigen, a comrade among comrades. But this isn't reciprocated enough for me to feel valued. He talks to our other friends more than with me.
Maybe he thinks I'm on a different level than him, or he's afraid of growing up, maybe he's just lazy. I don't know exactly what's going on with him because he rarely has a lasting heart to heart with me.
The wine is valuable because it's old, but it's so fucking bitter I could cry.
...
Now on the other hand, suppose you age your wine a little too quickly. You give it a lot of attention, too much. You want to speed up the process and get rewarded for your efforts. No time and distance is provided.
Guess what you end up with? Fucking grape juice.
This is the other side of the coin, and that other "friend" I used to have, thanks for helping me get rid of her by the way, seriously.
On the surface grape juice doesn't seem so bad, but if you recall my letter about sociopaths I made a point about being careful with people you like quickly who close the distance with you stupid fast.
It can also represent shallow relationships you wish could work but never will, or relationships that lack depth or a true bond. In my case that'd be internet friends, from random websites, online games, and classmates I had in school years ago.
Grape juice could be your favorite drink, but it's cheap and pretty much has no worth. You could make multiple bottles of this shit, but none of them are as valuable as real wine. Does that make sense?
It's sweet but that's all it ever will be, trying to get fucked up with it will definitely kill you.
...
My point is, time and distance matter. They bring value to relationships because becoming best friends with someone in less than 2 weeks is completely unreasonable and a huge red flag. Whether they're trying to do it or you are, you can't force people to care about you and vice versa. Some people never will care about you as much as you care for them.
It comes down to meaningful experiences being proven time and time again. Or checking in on your wine and being patient with it.
I'm sick and tired of the acidic old wines and cheap grape juice, both metaphorically and literally.
But maybe I don't have to age wine at all. Not because being a lone wolf is necessarily better, but because you're in my life. Quality over quantities.
Love, Seven 🍷🍇